Thursday, October 19, 2006

GVGOAT 10 - 6

The Top 10 has finally arrived. We've come a long way, and I think we're all a little bruised and juicy. Honestly, 10-6 could just as easily been 5-1 that's how close these games are. But since I'm doing a RANKING, I suppose I have to order them. Enjoy...

10) Super Mario World (SNES)
I still don't feel satisfied where I had to rank this game. Incredibly game play, lots of replayability factor, and fun hidden areas like star road all added to a fantastic game. It seems like it should be higher, but I can't put it ahead of the other nine. It need to move on....

Above: What sound do the Mario Bros. make going down stairs? Dago wop wop wop.

This game also marked the beginning of Yoshi, Mario's lovable dinodog. The fun thing about Yoshi was that he came in 4 colors and had abilities according to the colors. [Insert Racism Joke] Also, you get to wear a cape!

Fun Fact: To this day, I could tell you how to unlock all the star road zones and beat the sequence of 10 levels to change the game colors. For some reason, I'm proud of this.

9) Sim City 2000 (PC)
The Sim[game] franchise has been wonderful, with very few letdowns. But the series peaked with SC2000. The transition from SC to SC2000 was dramatic. The graphics went WAY up as well as the options. No game has ever been more successful at forcing you to keep track of 8000 things without the game feeling cumbersome. Also, the game felt like the designers/programmers had fun making the game. Sure it's possible they were locked up in North China forced to work 21 shifts for Maxis and are now WoW gold farmers, but it FELT like they had fun.

Above: I wonder where "The Incredibles" got their idea for the robot monster?

Fun Fact: I always had fun building a road that led to nowhere, and yet it would still get traffic. Yes, I had no life.

8) Legend of Zelda (NES)
Most great games end up defining or shaping how a genre of games will be. Shooters, Platformers, RPGs, etc all have their beginnings. But Zelda is a rarity. The Action/RPG genre IS Zelda. That's it. There's no one else that's even come close to what this series has accomplished. Sure the first Zelda was filled with typos and engrish, but it made zero difference. The game was unreal. Also, the Zelda theme is the BEST song in video game history. It is not up for debate.

Above: I Linked to this picture.

It's a secret to everybody! One of the weirdest choices you have to make in video games is when you find a heart container in Zelda. You can either:
1) Take the heart container which increases you max life forever and ever.
2) Take a potion which will refill your entire life one time. Also, these same potions can be purchased.

So, there is exactly ZERO situations you would want a potion. I'm not even sure why they would do such a thing.

Fun Fact: The single most irritating monster in video game history come from this game: Master Hand. Actually, panake monster makes a close second, since he eats your shield.

7) Grand Theft Auto (III - San Andreas)
Once GTA turned into the 3D sandlot world, gaming has never been the same. Sure, there's been imitators, but no game can match GTA on sheer gaming options. Racing, check. Explosions, check. Sex with hookers, check. And the list goes on...

Above: Gunman here, HELLO!

I'd give my vote for the best of the series to Vice City. However, to be fair, they had the best era to work with. I'm still amazed at how vast the San Andreas world is, I'm not sure how big the next one will be.

Fun Fact: I think the most fun I ever had with this series was flying around on a jet pack and assassinating guys on motorcycles. Seriously, top that.

6) Perfect Dark (N64)
The next generation of Rare's Goldeneye engine, this game took every great thing from Bond, left those alone and added incredible features on top. Sims, secondary weapon functions, and multiplayer challenges were all fantastic additions. You could also finally fall off ledges, have your screen beaten to death with punches, or attack mine onto people. I'm ready to play.

Above: Joanna's gonna pwn you.

Look, I don't care if you think it's cheating, laptops guns were the only way to go. If the AI was smart enough to use them, I don't think I could have beat them.

Fun Fact: The game was purchased by Wakefield, but he had a midterm or final the next day. So, Jack and I played the game for about 10 straight hours, only breaking to get pizza rolls and cream soda. We didn't pick up many chicks.

Only the final five to go....


At 1:37 PM, October 20, 2006, Blogger Jack Fu said...

Wow, GTA doesn't make the top 5! Upset alert!

Also: the theme songs (all of them) from "Super Mario Bros." and "MegaMan 2" would kick the shit out of those in "Zelda," and then take their lunch money, kick 'em in the junk, and have sex with their girlfriend.

I forget, has "Mario Tennis" been on the list?

At 1:43 PM, October 20, 2006, Blogger The Diddy said...

I told you, the best theme song is not up for debate. Kick and scream all you want, it's just how it is.

Mario Tennis has not been on the list. And I wouldn't expect to see it in the top 5. It simply wasn't worthy.

At 11:56 PM, October 20, 2006, Blogger Jack Fu said...

NOT TOP-90-WHATEVER!?!?!?!?!?

Your brazen refusal to include Mario Tennis risks invalidating the entire list. Bastard.

At 10:27 AM, October 21, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know how I know you're gay...You didn't include Mario Tennis on your list." THAT'S A TENNIS SHOT!", "DEEP IN THE VAG!", "I'M A LITTLE BABY!" just some of the great quotes to come about during the play of this game. And this game has a serious attachment with the Cuervo, so obviously, you don't like the Cuervo. You suck at life. This list stinks. Oh..but Dragon Warrior III deserves that ranking?!...has anyone else here ever played that game...I didn't think so. I could not agree more with Jackson's comments on the theme song debate. Super Mario Bros. and Megaman II are in fact better than Zelda. Don't get me wrong, when I hear the theme song from Zelda I do get excited. But when I hear the song from Flashman's world, I lose all sense of reality and get lost in its' beauty. I expect nothing less than golden picks for the top 5. Also just on a side note...I know I've spoken with Todd about this, but did anyone else play the King's Quest or Space Quest series when they were kids...cause those games ROCKED. comments/concerns?
-Quickman likes the pink....Cave

At 7:38 PM, October 21, 2006, Blogger The Diddy said...

Just b\c you have fond memories or quotes from a game doesn't mean it deserves a ranking. Phil and I had a great time playing zombie nation, and that game was terrible. The fact is there's nothing wonderful about Mario Tennis. I'm not saying I don't like the game, but it could easily be replaced by 20 other tennis games.

At 12:09 PM, October 24, 2006, Anonymous Break of Dawn said...

I'm not sure I can trust a video game list with such blatant disregard for Mario Tennis. Senior Year I spent easily 100 dollars in late fees to the local Blockbuster. And, you know what? It was worth it.

(I agree that Sim City 2000 was the crowning achievement of the series. Though, I never played the 3000 edition.)

At 9:38 AM, June 16, 2012, Anonymous said...

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