Friday, August 12, 2005

Disjointed responses to Dids

- The Poll -
1.) In my opinion, considering the way the rivalry’s been dominated by Oklahoma lately, the only way you should ever ever EVER put Texas at #2 is if you have the Sooners #1. But that’s just me.
2.) Any pollster who doesn’t have USC #1 is a total moron and should have their ballot revoked. Now last year, I thought it was somewhat Kid-Icarus that USC was a near-unanimous #1, considering that they had lost 4/5 of their O-Line and 3/4 of their D-Line. Now, they return their entire offense, and although they lost some key players from the D (Patterson, Cody, Tatupu, to name a few), they’re still loaded. Plus, they have the super-sexy Matt Leinart, whose warm smile and carefully disheveled hair make him Dreamboat #1 in the MWB’s book. *giggle*
*In general:
1.) Polls are bullshit; preseason ones doubly so. Polls shouldn’t come out until ... I don’t know, every team has played 2 in-conference games. Why not.
2.) Four Big Ten squads in the top 16. Not bad. Missing OSU and Michigan, and getting Aiwa at home, Purdue’s on a gravy train with biscuit wheels to an undefeated season - personally, I CAN’T WAIT to see how Joe Tiller manages to find the banana peel this time. The X-factor: Brandon Kirsch. He’s shown flashes of equal parts ineptitude and jaw-dropping playmaking ability. Will he be more "Kyle Orton" or more "Brandon Hance"? The Boilerhomo season depends on that very question.
3.) The SEC outdoes the Big Ten, and everyone else for that matter, with 6 teams in the top-25, FIVE OF WHICH ARE IN THE TOP 15. So nine of the top 16 teams in the country are from the Big Ten or SEC. Yeah, that actually sounds about right. The total conference numbers come out about exactly how you’d expect: SEC - 6; ACC - 5; Big Ten - 4; Big XII - 4; Pac10 - 3; Big Least - 2; WAC - 1.
4.) Fiu answered the Duke quandary today on CFN: Steve Spurrier always votes Duke 25th in his preseason poll, if he is given one. Hey, I guess at least we know HE actually fills it out, and not his secretary.
*RE: Injun mascots
This is ree-fucking-diculous. Who the fuck is the NCAA to come in and tell Florida State, Illinois, Central Michigan, North Dakota, and whoever else that, even though the respective Indian tribes from which they take their team names all condone (or even endorse) the practice, they shouldn’t be able to go by the names Seminole, Illini, Chippewa, and Sioux? As Dan Wetzel said on yahoo, can the NCAA reasonably explain why the Fighting Sioux of North Dakota is offensive, but the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame is not? More importantly, if the aforementioned Seminole, Chippewa, and Sioux indian tribes are all okay with it, then why the hell interfere? Doesn’t make a lick of sense to me.
- Terrell Owens -
This guy might be the most self-absorbed person to ever walk the planet. I hope they carve his infamous quote "I love me some me" on his fucking tombstone. Anywhoodle, the pertinent questions regarding this drama:
1.) Was this whole thing (the showing up, then leaving) orchestrated by T.O.?
A: Oh, undoubtedly. He even said that he would show up to training camp and make a scene. Rather than hold out, he decided to show up to camp, pout like a petulant 5-year old, and piss everyone off to the point that he gets booted from camp. Incidentally, I think my favorite part of the saga thus far was when, as he was trying to negotiate his deal prior to training camp, he actually came out and said they should all just act like adults and figure something out, while mere seconds later dropping the vague threat, "I’ll be there (training camp). But I won’t be happy. Take from that whatever you want." Yes, T.O., that’s very adult-like. But hey, what can you expect - the guy carries himself at all times like a small child who thinks the world revolves around him.
B.) Do NFL teams routinely screw players, back-loading their contracts, then renegotiating the number down (or even cutting the guy) when the player becomes less productive later in their career?
A: Absolutely. It’s a sad truth, I know. But you know what? THAT IS WHAT YOUR UNION COLLECTIVELY BARGAINED FOR YOU. THAT IS THE LAW UNDER WHICH YOU OPERATE. The proper remedy is to be pissed at your union reps and elect new ones the next time you get the chance. Or bring a grievance, which you will undoubtedly lose, because, you know, that’s what your union bargained.
C.) Did Owens outperform his old contract?
A: This is where you get into some problems. Yes, he had a huge year last year. But his contract is for 7 years and $49 million. That makes him the 3rd-highest paid WR in the league. And if you add up his numbers over the last five years, statistically he has been ... guess what? THE THIRD-BEST RECEIVER IN THE LEAGUE. How in the hell is being "underpaid"? And people keep throwing around this idea that he’s getting "less than he’s worth," implying that his market value is higher than what he’s getting. Well, I got news for T.O.: what you’re worth, what your market value is, is not determined by WHAT YOU THINK YOU’RE WORTH. It’s determined by what you would get if you were out on the free market. After everything he has done the past 5+ years -- all the antics, all the bitching, basically all the distraction-creating -- are there really teams out there who would shell out more than 7 years and $49 million for him? Are you sure?
Plus, let’s not forget that T.O. bullied his way out of San Fran, then decided he didn’t want to play for Baltimore, and then HAND-PICKED the Eagles as his chosen destination. Everyone knows Philly is a tightwad organization. The fucker knew what he was getting into, and he was an absolute and utter asshole in how he got there. Now he’s gotta take his medicine, because he really doesn’t have a leg to stand on.
Okay, that’s all I got for now. DAS EIGHT RUCKY!


At 1:36 PM, August 12, 2005, Blogger The Diddy said...

More on TO - Look I realise this isn't the NBA where market value means, "I'm going to the Knicks". But still, you don't think the Raiders would pay almost any amount to have T.O. play with Moss? Also, I would be in total favor of that. You know the media would love it. They love anything that makes there job easy. (Side note - I think sportswriters have about the easiest job there is, and all they ever want is for it to be easier so they can be lazier) I'm generally not in agreance with the media, but if Moss and TO were on the same team, the possibilites would be endless.

At 12:40 AM, August 15, 2005, Blogger Torgonator said...

Also, in regards to NFL contracts...

The long, large contracts like T.O's are taken with slightly more worth than Phil treats a bowling alley with a bowling ball. Most of the time they are signed as a show of mutual support, but that's the extent of their worth. Neither the player nor the GM actually expects the contract to compelete it's natural life cycle.

A couple years ago, Donovan McNabb signed a 10-year, $115M contract. Everyone, including Donovan's agent, expressed at the time that the contract length was pretty meaningless. These big, long contracts are signed more as publicity stunts than anything. It gives the team the ability to throw support behind a likeable and talented guy and it allows the player to tell the team groupies that he's got a $115M contract.

Given the meteoric rises and falls in the game - due in large part to opportunity and injury - I think it's perfectly reasonable for the market value to be looked at every year by both player and GM. The real trick of it is deciding when, as each concerned party, to raise the topic and push for a favorable change. And I think that T.O. whined again too soon and has over-played his hand. Will it hurt him financially? I doubt it. But it has managed to turn the tide of public opinion against him even more. You can get away with that while you're a superstar, but the more of a dick you are the better you have to be before people run out of patience with you.

On a somewhat related note, while it's very rare that I long for anything associated with the NBA, I wish the NFL would enlist the NBA policy regarding rookie contracts. I just think it would be better for everyone involved - except, I suppose, for over-hyped college seniors... but I can live with that. It would end these stupid, drawn-out rookie contract negotiations that keep players out of camp for weeks on end. It starts rookies behind in training camp which hurts them and the team, and it often guarantees that the team's new, highly-priced player won't be worth what he's slated to make in year one.

Most of all, it hurts the one major component of the NFL that is not involved in the negotiations - the fans. In the end, we're the ones really paying the salaries. For my money, I'd like to see players in training camp on day one, giving them every opportunity to be ready for opening day.

So let's give NFL rookies a set salary structure based on where they get drafted. Maybe just make them two-year deals. It's enough time to let the players learn a professional offensive or defensive system and to get their bearings and it gives the team a test-run of their draft selection. After the two years are up, the actual player values should be easier to determine for everyone involved.

On even more of a tangent...

One of my favorite agent negotiation points which gained a lot of popularity after the Poston's negotiations for the thoroughly unlikeable Kellen Winslow Jr. - "We know he wasn't drafted #1 overall, but we know a team that had him rated as the #1 player in the draft. So we want #1 money." That argument makes me tri-furious. That statement is upsetting on several levels, but I think what bothers me the most is that the first round draft pick contract negotiation dance happens the same way every year - and yet there's always a few cases ever year you hear about where the agents are trying to use some lame-brained ploy to try to convince an owner that the system will bend for a salary bulge in the draft order.

At 11:19 AM, August 15, 2005, Blogger Jack Fu said...

The thing is, T.O.’s contract was fine. With the goofy-ass structuring of it, he made something like $6 million last year, and he was due to make about $650,000 this year. A pittance, right? BUT, at the end of this season, he was eligible for a club option of $7 million! And, if he produced on the field this year, the Eagles would definitely have exercised the option, and T.O. would essentially be earning $13.5 million in his first two years with the Eagles (and that’s not counting the signing bonus he got when he first signed the contract). That puts him JUST behind Randy Moss, as the 2nd highest-paid receiver in the league. Plus, if the Eagles inexplicably decided NOT to exercise the option, he would be a free agent, free to test his market value ... which would be pretty high, if not for his recent idiotic and childish behavior. So don’t give me this BS about his contract being so awful and back-ended. The guy is making a dickload of money.

Also, he keeps talking about how he “outperformed” the contract ... but didn’t he sign the damn thing EXPECTING to do well? Did he say, “Well, I’m worth about $10 million per, but I’m probably not going to have that good a season, so let’s sign a deal saying I’m only worth $7 million”?? No, he said “You’re gonna get the best that I’ve got, and you’re gonna pay me $7 mil per for it.” He signed the deal, agreeing that “maximum T.O.” was worth about $7 mil. Plus, let’s not forget, when the deal was drawn up, the Eagles specifically asked him, “Is this gonna make you happy? Because if you’re gonna bitch about this contract, we don’t want you here. That’s not what the Eagles are about.” AND HE SAID “YES.” But, of course, that was when T.O. was with his old agent, before he joined forces with Lucifer ... I mean, Drew Rosenhaus, a guy who is hated by other agents because of how he steals their clients by promising them that he will get NFL teams to renegotiate their contracts and get them more money. He basically, as Leigh Steinburg said, goes up to players who are already represented and says “Hey, I noticed you’re only making $4 million this year. Well, if you come to me, I’ll get the Panthers to double that,” whether he has any practical chance of doing it or not. He’s easily one of the most loathsome men in sports. Clearly, he and T.O. deserve each other.

At 1:52 PM, August 15, 2005, Blogger Torgonator said...

Rosenhaus is totally the anti-Christ.

That contract structure for T.O. is really strange. Not that I have extensive knowledge of NFL player contracts, but I can't say I've ever heard of a contract structured like that before. I guess T.O. was pretty damn confident that the Eagles would pick up the option.

In unrelated news... did you notice that the Caveman actually left a comment on the Cave List post?

At 5:09 PM, August 18, 2005, Blogger Jack Fu said...

"I guess T.O. was pretty damn confident that the Eagles would pick up the option."

I'm not sure how you get that. I don't see the connection. But then, I'm stoopid.

"did you notice that the Caveman actually left a comment on the Cave List post?"

I want to get his opinion on whether or not Erin looks like Stewart Mandel. CAVE, WHERE ARE YOU???

At 11:50 PM, August 22, 2005, Blogger Torgonator said...

I think it's pretty simple, really, and I based the conclusion solely on what you said...

You said that he made $6 million last year and was due to make only $650,000 this year... but he could earn an additional $7 million this year if the Eagles picked up his option....

Meaning that he would suffer a severe salary drop if the Eagles didn't pick up his option due to the contract that he signed...

I would therefore assume that T.O. expected to have his option picked up this year, otherwise he probably wouldn't have agreed to only $650,000 in guaranteed money.

But I could be wrong. Maybe I misread your statement or maybe T.O. didn't care if he only made $650,000 this year. I mean, if it were me, I wouldn't sign a contract like that unless I was pretty damn certain the option was gonna be picked up. But let me know if I misread your statement.

This is all relative, of course, because I wouldn't hesitate to sign any contract that offered to pay me $650,000 to be a software consultant.

At 11:54 PM, August 22, 2005, Blogger Torgonator said...

Oh, and for the record, I was leaving the signing bonus out of the discussion since the signing bonus is distributed in a more-or-less even amount across the life of the contract (with inflationary factors included). It's even-ness means it can essentially be factored out as a constant between years.

At 12:19 PM, August 23, 2005, Blogger Jack Fu said...

I thought you meant "T.O. was pretty damn confident that the Eagles would pick up the option" as a justification for why he was holding out, not why he signed it in the first place. My bad. Of course he thought it would get picked up - if there's one thing T.O. certainly has in abundance, it's confidence/arrogance...

At 3:34 PM, August 23, 2005, Blogger Torgonator said...

And you know what you have? An uncomfortably large penis.


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