Sunday, May 01, 2005

I want you and your beautiful soul

Hey, I'm totally still here. I've been far too distracted lately thinking about Jesse McCartney and Evan's new favorite song, "Beautiful Soul". I highly recommend it. Even more than the song is the adorable 16-year-old artist(?), Jesse McCartney.

Above: Jesse lookin' tough

He's just too cute!! He used to be in a band called Sugar Beats. However, that's when he was much younger and not into love yet. teehee!!

Above: Guns Blazin'!!!

However, I have to figure that other teenie-popstars like Aaron Carter can be happy about Jesse getting in on the action. I mean, Jesse is so much cuter!!!

Above: Aaron it out

After reading that picture of the younger carter, I learned two things: Nick Carter is hard up for work and I'm not sure that Jesse and Aaron Carter are different people.

Okay, let's talk about sports now. I was watching sportscenter the other night and found out that Jeff Gordon is now (since he won today) within 4 victories of catching Dead Dale Sr. for the all-time win total in NASCAR history. During that same segment Steve Levy also said, "Restrictor plates get me sooooo hot." Which was hilarious, but anyway...I have to think that the passing of Dead Dale Sr (extra joke there, think about it) by Jeff Gordon and his rainbow warriors has to be the most annoying thing to NASCAR fans since the premier of Queer Eye or losing the Civil War. I mean, Gordon actually graduated high school!!! There's a good chance he's gonna be chased by crazed fans like Hank Aaron was when he was trying to pass Ruth. Should be interesting to see how it goes down. And yes, I know it's nascar. SHUTUP!!!

I'm furious with baseball. There, I said it.

After watching the spring game and then reading the cfn preview of the bucks, I'm way too geared up for college football to start. I had a bit of an insight while reading through some of the articles on cfn. Everyone, including myself, is high on iowa this year. There's good reason for that, they're good. However, they are gonna have a major problem: replacing the d-line. I remember last year when everyone thought our LBs would be good enough to overcome the fact we lost our great d-line. I didn't quite work that way. We got zero qb pressure and it really hurt the D. It's a problem that's generally ignored, line strength, but there's a good chance it's going to hurt iowa this coming year like it hurt us last season. Therefore, after realizing that fact and looking at the schedule, I think there's a good chance we'll be 10-0 heading into Ann Arbor. However, I'm not saying it's a lock, you'll know that once I bust out my way to early game by game predictions. Who called the NW game last year?? And ND over Mich?? You know who silly. This guy.


At 9:20 AM, May 04, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, the fact that it's May and Steve Levy is talking about NASCAR and not calling a multiple-overtime Stanley Cup playoff game with Darren Pang is so sad I think I'm gonna cry.

- Nips

At 9:42 AM, May 04, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

On another note entirely...what's the most useless thing in sports? No, not Tayshaun Prince's strength coach. It's CHEERLEADING!!! Knowing that it's useless, cheerleading has been trying to get itself in the news recently. Observe:

Cheerleader Charged With Giving Grain Alcohol To Boy

Benjamin L. Mook, Editor

OCEAN CITY (04/15/2005) - A 12-year-old boy remains on the road to recovery after he suffered from alcohol poisoning when a 21-year-old cheerleader gave him 10 shots of 190-proof grain alcohol.

Matthew Martin Mezydlo, of Bel Air, Md., was charged early Sunday with supplying grain alcohol to a teenaged boy he was hanging out with after a cheerleading convention in Ocean City.

Ocean City Police Department Chris Snyder joined resort paramedics in a joint response to the Carousel Hotel on April 10. At 1:30 a.m., police and paramedics were alerted to an unconscious 12-year-old boy at the hotel.

When Snyder arrived, he found the boy was still breathing, but was unconscious and had vomited. The boy’s mother and Snyder took him out of the bathroom and rolled him onto his side.

The boy faded in and out of consciousness, but was able to give his last name. Snyder later learned the boy had consumed as much as 10 ounces of Everclear-brand grain alcohol. The boy was taken to Atlantic General Hospital and was later transferred to King’s Daughter’s Children’s Hospital, in Norfolk, Va. As of Monday, the boy’s condition was reported as steadily improving.

After the boy was taken away, Snyder started speaking with witnesses and piecing together what happened. He learned the boy was in town for a cheerleading convention and several witnesses recalled seeing him with two older men after the event concluded around 11 p.m. Snyder also learned the boy had been at the Clarion hotel, which was were Mezydlo was staying.

Snyder arrived at the hotel and found a group of cheerleaders talking about the incident. Mezydlo was among them.

Snyder later confronted Mezydlo and told him that if the boy died, he would be the prime suspect. Snyder then spoke with Christopher Chase Clark, 19, who rented the room. He reportedly admitted to being present when the boy was drinking with them. He said Mezydlo bought the grain alcohol, along with some beer, vodka and punch.

According to court records, Mezydlo at first denied buying the alcohol or supplying it to the boy. After several inconsistencies in the story surfaced, he reportedly told Snyder he bought the alcohol and admitted to drinking with the 12-year-old.

Snyder later applied for an additional charge of contributing to a certain condition of a child against Mezydlo.
Okay, what have we learned?
1. That kid's a fuckin' lightweight.
2. Camp Jim has some serious recruiting violations goin' on here. I think there's gonna be sanctions.
3. That kid's dad isn't alive. Casue if he was, he wouldn't have let him go to an out of town cheerleading camp in the first place.
4. That incident took the term "jesus juice" to a new level.
5. The fact that this happened on my birthday is just a coincidence. I swear.

Alright, next story.
Texas considers ban on sexy cheerleaders

AUSTIN, United States (AFP) - Legislators in Texas, famed for its Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders, considered legislation to ban 'sexually suggestive' performances in schools.

The law would ban dance routines by school cheerleaders at sports events that one politician said was like something out of a strip club.

Exposed midriffs and ever shorter shorts and skirts have particularly outraged some legislators.

"Some of them are just downright vulgar, something you would see at an adult club or something," said Joe Deshotel, a Democratic member of the Texas House of Representatives, which is considering the bill. "The problem is in the eye of the beholder, I guess."

One of the co-authors of the bill, Republican Corbin Van Arsdale, said many parents want restrictions because they go to Friday night games to see young men clashing on the football field, not girls shaking their behinds on the sidelines.

"You've got children seeing things that their parents would rather them not see," said Van Arsdale.

But the proposed ban is not popular with the National Cheerleaders Association or the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU). The bill would allow the Texas Education Agency to ban routines deemed vulgar or excessive.

"Without a specific definition of what these kids cannot perform, the sky is the limit," the ACLU warned. "Any complaintant can construe any dance step, cheer or movement of any sort as sexually suggestive."

The Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders began captivating audiences with their sexy drill team routines, knee-high white boots and low-cut tops, in the 1970s. Cheerleaders have since become a fixture of football games across the United States from high school to professional teams.

In Texas, the obsession came into violent focus in 1991, when Wanda Holloway, nicknamed the "pompom mom", was accused of trying to murder the mother of her daughter's cheerleading rival.

Supporters of the legislation say those kinds of excesses show why change is necessary. They want to take Texas back to simpler days, when drill teams performed traditional routines, wore patriotic clothing and longer skirts.

"I think we should look at going back to the old traditions, to the art of dance," said Representative Tommy Merritt, a Republican. "It doesn't have to be all bumpin' and grindin'," he declared.


All I have to say about this is that any debate that gets elected officials to say, "all bumpin' and grindin'" is a good debate to have.

- Nips

At 3:26 PM, May 06, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, I'd be remiss if I didn't post my Derby picks here. And just for the record Afleet Alex was my pick BEFORE everyone started hoppin on his bandwagon.

1. Afleet Alex
2. Bandini
3. Sun King

There. I've just jinxed all 3 of 'em.

- Nips


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